Being Female

Past Chris says:

Monday the 8th of March, 2004. 

Dear Diary, 

If I were the opposite sex my life would be a lot different. I would probably care more about my looks eg. hair, make up, dress in the morning, have a half an hour/hour shower, then spend another half an hour in front of the mirror. But at first I would probably scream and I would have to get used to sitting on the toilet. I would not come to school in the morning or ever. I would be different because I would have to wear a bra and start thinking about periods. Having a higher voice would be different too. I would be better because I would be a better singer. It would be worse because I would have periods etc...

I DON'T WANT TO BE A GIRL!!!!!!!

5 years later, present Chris says: 

I'm sorry past Chris, but you are wrong my friend, very wrong. And I would like to present to you a counter proposal. Life would be so much easier if I were a girl. Sure, I would have periods and have to give birth and have serious PMS issues (worse than the PMS issues I have as a guy) but I would also have boobs. Boobs are gods gift to humanity. Guys are addicted to them, girls use them to use boys to their advantage. For example, if I were a girl and I had to pay full price for my bus fare because I forgot my concession card, I would 'accidentally' unbutton my top and the bus driver would do my bidding. Also, it is way easier for girls to get boyfriends and sex. All a girl has to do is let slip that she is 'lonely' and in an instant a multitude of guys would rush to her attendance. The same simply would not happen for a guy.

So there you go Past Chris you jerk! Present Chris 1, Past Chris 0.